Thursday, January 15, 2015

I'll Never Let You Part For You're Always In My Heart.


I'm sorry that I haven't been around in a while. 
My lovely Mum, Julie, passed away on the 28th of December and I'm still trying to get my head around it. She'd been ill with cancer since July, but all the doctors were optimistic that she'd make a recovery, sadly the disease had spread into her liver & brain and she was gone before we could even process that information. 

I've been absent, as you can understand, as I'm just trying to deal with it. I'm happy that she's not in pain anymore because, believe me, she was in agony those final few days. So the fact that she's at peace now is keeping me sane at the minute. It's difficult waking up everyday and not being able to hug her and have a conversation with her, but I know there's nothing I can do about it. I'm staying strong for my dad, mostly. I've broken down several times when I've been alone, but I don't want to feel weak, I want to be strong for my dad as he's took it harder than myself. After all he knew her for 40 years. Her funeral takes place on Tuesday and I'm not sure how I feel about it. I'm glad that she's going to be cremated, like she wished, but I'm not looking forward to the mound of people that apparently knew her enough to want to show their faces. At the end of the day, I've got to just be there and ignore the people that think they're doing 'good' by turning up.

I've bought myself and my dad a little necklace that we can place some of my mum's ashes in and keep her close by. At least that might give me some comfort when I think of her.

I don't know whether I'll be back blogging because at the minute I can't be arsed doing anything at all. So thank you for stopping by again and thank you to everyone that sent me the lovely messages on facebook and twitter, I appreciate them all.

Until next time,
Laura x

3 comments:

  1. So sorry to hear about your Mum :( I can't even begin to imagine what you must be going through.
    Natalie xx

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  2. Sorry to hear about your mum x

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  3. I was so sorry to hear about your mum :(
    If you ever need to talk to someone, we are all here for you. Take all the time you need.

    Dannie x

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